Friday reflection

La Shawn Barber's self-reflective post this Friday has caused me to turn the mirror toward myself today in a manner I haven't attempted in quite a while. The end of the week definitely feels like the best time to look at the past and current state of our existence and contemplate how this is carrying us toward the future. Below are 3 questions that La Shawn poses for us to consider, and my answers to these questions.

1) What haven’t you done yet in your life that you’d really like to do someday? Why? Will you do any of those things in the near future? Are you making progress toward them?

— I've always dreamt of becoming self-employed. I hate complaining almost as much as I hate hearing others do it, and the workplace can be a cesspool of grumblers. Not only do I get a rush from being at the center of the decision-making process, but I also enjoy pulling individuals together to pool resources and solve problems. Add in the fact that I'm not usually in bed before midnight, and I think you've got the workings of a great business owner! :-) I've gathered a considerable amount of information and done extensive research on entrepreneurship, and have only been slowed down by the focus on my young children. As they continue to grow and become more and more independent, more time is left for me to focus on making progress toward this dream.

— I always felt that La Shawn and I had a lot in common, and the anglophilia is no exception. Most people that I know prefer to stay within the confines of what they are familiar with. But I have always longed to experience something more. Not necessarily better, but definitely different. I don't know where this comes from and how this was fostered inside of me, but I've always enjoyed British humor more, appreciated their style when it comes to music, and longed to spend a few years there enriching myself with the history of England (and the rest of the UK as well). My husband and I have already decided to take a very long vacation there within the next 5 years.

2) If you could completely start your life over from scratch, what would you do differently the second time around (if anything)? Why?

— If this opportunity were possible I would go back to my pre-teen years and focus on being happy with who I was. That stage of my life was when I began to adjust who I was in order to appear to "be" someone else. I loved my life, my family and everything that I was blessed with, but I always tried to adapt to whoever I was around by "being" someone else to make them comfortable. It became a habit and this behavior followed me all the way to college! My college years was when the realization of what I was doing started to become clear to me. I had to go through a period of spiritual and emotional renewal in order to discover who I really was, what I really wanted. That behavior actually still affects many of the relationships that are being restored in my life now. Some people who knew me back then don't seem sure how to take this "real" Tami! :-)

3) What do you think you’ll be like when you’re 70, 80, 90, possibly even 100 years old? Where do you think you’ll be living, and what activities do you think you’ll enjoy?

— Please do not chuckle, but I intend to be living in Melbourne, Florida in my golden years, and running a fitness and nutrition center for seniors. I hope to have accumulated enough money by this time to already have a trust fund setup by then for my kids. Hopefully, they will also still be profiting from the business that I started in my 30's. :-) I hope that I will be taking several trips per year with my family and I also hope to be a lead prayer warrior for my church or the community at large. I want to be able to make a difference in others' lives during the period of my life that I'm focused on preparing to meet my Savior face to face!

4) What ages do you think have been the best for you so far? Why? What do you think of your current age…are you enjoying it? Are you looking forward to your next birthday?

— I can honestly say that 30 has been the best age I've experienced so far. I'm currently 31 years old, and this is the first time in my life where I have learned to balance concern with how others view me publicly, along with a confidence in my decisions and livelihood with little regard to others' opinions on the subject. There has always been such a thin line there for most of my life. I finally know who I am and whose I am unequivocally! I am also coming out of this comfort zone that I've always hid within. I'm starting to try new foods, new styles of clothing and hair, books, and even friendships! My horizons have been expanded this year like never before in my life...it can only get better as the years go on, I believe!