Stuck inside...again

Well, I guess I'm finally living the more realistic life of a parent. The kids are still battling these fevers. My son seems to mostly be over his, but my daughter woke up blazing hot this morning. The kids slept in the bed with my hubby, and I slept on the sofa because I'm too finicky to deal with two congested children, and a boxer within feet of me all at the same time while I'm trying to get some sleep.

Back when Chris and I had our son, my parents were SO available all of the time. My mom even spent a full two weeks at our house after we brought him home from the hospital. (As a side note, I suggest that new parents get the full experience for about a week by themselves before calling in the grandparents; you'll be able to appreciate them a lot more if you actually get to see how tiring it can be to care for a new infant - otherwise you'll probably constantly tread the line of "Hey, I'M the mother of this child so stop telling me what to do!")

But I digress. If you read this blog regularly you know that I lost my grandmother a month ago. She first got sick back on October 25, and my mom began caring for her 24/7 while she was hospitalized, transferred to a nursing home, etc... Before this, my parents have always been available to keep our kids (and my sister's kids) at a moment's notice. About once a month (sometimes twice) my hubby and I would get to have some time alone. I often found myself wondering how realistic this was. Many times I would cringe at having to call my mom and ask her if she would keep our kids overnight...again...after just keeping them two weeks ago, and keeping my sister's kids the previous week. You see, I'm of the belief that you have to be VERY careful what you ask of someone, and that you should never ask of someone else what you are not willing to do yourself. As it relates to my parents keeping our kids, there are a couple of reasons why I have always thought we should pull back on bugging them every other week or so:

1) Yes, I understand that grandparents LOVE spending time with their grandkids. It's really easy if you think of it that way. But ask yourself this question, When you become 50 years old, are you going to want to have toddlers at your house for the entire weekend for 3 weekends out of a month? Yes, that was a rhetorical question. If you are one of those few people that would answer, "Yes, I would LOVE that!", then you're in the clear. :-) However, if you are the person that's always trying to find someone to watch your kids on the weekends, then you are the type of person that wants to have your own time a lot...that doesn't change just because you turn 50 and have grandkids, people.

When my sister and I were little, we NEVER had babysitters. Even though my grandmother lived in my parents' house, my mom and dad NEVER left us overnight. They really enjoyed spending time with us. They would find things for us to do on the weekends together as a family. So, of course, as grandparents in their fifties, they haven't changed. They LOVE having the grandkids around on the weekends. That's the kind of people that they are. But we are all different. If you find someone to keep your kids overnight once or twice each month while you (and maybe your spouse) go off and do your own thing, it goes without saying that you aren't the kind of person that will want to spend 2 or 3 weekends out of the month watching your kids' kids. Yep, that's right, if you have more than one child, that's at least one grandchild per week. Something to think about huh?

2) Another reality that I am finally opening myself up to. We live in Atlanta, and it has finally become almost completely saturated. I know so many people who are entering fields that don't leave very many options in a small, but heavily populated city such as this. Many of these people are having to pack up their families and leave Atlanta. I have always been adversely opposed to this option. My husband has known since we got engaged not to even go where with me about leaving Atlanta. I was raised this way...you don't ever leave your family. Heck, living 30 minutes away from my parents was enough of a shock and jolt, so I couldn't imagine what would happen if God forbid we moved to another state! Not to mention the fact that we wouldn't have anyone to watch our kids overnight anymore. In fact, at this point, that is the only thing stopping me. I don't leave my kids with ANYONE except for my mom and dad. NO ONE. So if we moved away, my hubby and I would never have any alone time and that was a thought that I couldn't bear! Until now.

As I mentioned earlier in this post, it's been a little over 3 months since my hubby and I have had any time at all together to ourselves. We haven't even gone out to dinner together or anything. So, now, I know that we can bear this kind of reality if we have to. We have been forced to. We are tired all of the time, but we have just become more creative about things to do with the kids on the weekends. While the kids nap, we nap. We have become smarter with our free time. When my husband graduates from law school, if the best offer he receives (and by best I mean salary + hours + responsibility) is in Florida, or North Carolina, or somewhere else, we will have to at the very least consider it. For the first time in my life, this is an option for us, and makes things less stressful for my husband and his pending job search.

I know that this is an extremely long post, but I've been thinking about this for a while. These are the types of things that I don't have anyone to talk to about, so I just spill it all here. :-)