Ash Wednesday

Today feels really good. I feel really clean and full of purpose today. I can't explain it completely, but I honestly feel as though I have been cleansed and refreshed, and prepared for a new endeavor.

The thought of what to "give up" or sacrifice during Lent kept running through my mind all day yesterday. This morning the answer was as clear as crystal. I will be giving up idle behavior. This includes the hours of time per day that I spend aimlessly surfing the net perusing for celebrity gossip, the hours per day that I spend watching reality television (that one will be REALLY tough for me), and the spontaneous actions I take when I feel that I can sneak in some previously unscheduled me time. Not only am I suffering as a result of all of this idle time, but so are those around me who depend on me.

So here's the plan: For the next 40 days I will spend the evenings with my children. Cooking dinner, playing, reading to one another, family bonding. By 7pm, I will be bathing them, and by 7:30pm they will be in the bed. I will give them about 30 minutes of playtime before lights out. Successfully implementing this is going to be drama in the beginning. They DO NOT listen to me at all when I tell them to go to bed. I mean, they will lie down and close their eyes while I'm standing there, but as soon as I close the door, they are back to playing. Lately, they've been going to bed around 12 midnight!! They are up at 6:30am, and they are only little tykes who need lots of rest, so this just can't be good long-term. This will not be easy, and will require some real stamina on my part. My kids are worth it, though. I will also be spending this extra time cleaning up after everyone once the kids are in bed. If I do this daily, it should only take a half-hour tops. Also, I will be spending a minimum of 1 hour in daily prayer and meditation. I am really looking forward to this. Life feels so much more worth living when you are closely connected with the Heavenly Jehovah through the Holy Spirit. No other way to explain it other than that.

My hope is that by the time we're about halfway to Easter Sunday, this new behavior will become a normal habit for me and not something I have to remind myself to do everyday. We shall soon see!