Big Ole Grump Box

That's what I've been this week. I'm tired of working ALL of the time. I'm tired of neglecting the things that are important; putting them off until I'm done with other stuff, stuff which is not as important long-term. I can see that it's starting to take its toll. A co-worker voiced yesterday that she's been feeling really grumpy lately and needs a REAL vacation. BOY could I relate! This might be wrong, but it felt good to know that someone could relate to how I've been feeling (although she and I are pretty similar in a lot of ways anyway).

I just want to drive around at night with my husband and kids and "oooh and ahhh" at the pretty Christmas lights! I want to make Christmas cookies and chocolate cocoa with the kids. I want to lay around in my PJ's and thermal socks and watch all of the Christmas classics (Rudolph, Frosty, Charlie Brown, Wonderful Life, etc...) I want to lay on my mom's couch and hear my grandmother's old Christmas 45s on a turntable while sipping hot apple cider. In short, I just want to be happy this Christmas. Last Christmas was the first one in my entire life that I was unhappy and slightly depressed. My Grandmother's health took a turn for the worse on Christmas Day 2007. We were with her in the hospital and I could tell she was getting worse, even though my heart wouldn't accept it. She passed away suddenly 5 days later and my family was heartbroken. I had hoped this Christmas would be better, but so far I just feel burnt out.

My son's behavior has been leaving lots to be desired at school lately, also. That's really got me down more than anything, I believe. He's always been the perfect kid that everyone loves being around, but all of a sudden his daily progress reports have negative feedback on them everyday. I know that this is just a phase, but I'm not handling it well on the inside. He turns 5 on Sunday, so he's just a little one. But this time in his life is critical to who he will become as a man, and I want to be sure that everything I do as his mom pushes him in the right direction.

Next week is my last week in the office until January (and I'm only going in for 4 days). Maybe I can do some of the things I mentioned above during my two weeks off! That would be nothing short of a miracle, but as long as I'm not sitting around working constantly and feeling stressed, I'm already going in a better direction. :-)

Beginning the Christmas holidays with a bang!

Update: 12/9/08 8:10pm

Don't have much time these days; work is EXTRA, EXTRA busy. That 2 week vacation is going to be more special and necessary than EVER!

Just a posting tonight to note that I made it through the official week 1 of health and fitness swimmingly!! I only cheated 1 day which was Thursday right before my son's Christmas play. I didn't even get home from work until after 6pm and had to have him at his school by 6:45pm. He left 6 ketchup-drenched fries on his plate from dinner so I ate them. But the rest of the week went WONDERFULLY! Chris and I are competing in a fitness competition middle of next year so we're on a pretty structured plan for our health and fitness. We give ourselves 1 cheat meal per week. Not cheat-day like most people, but cheat meal only. I know better; people with my personality can't be given so much as an inch. :-)

Progress Report: Back on November 14 I weighed myself on one of those scales in the convenience store restrooms where you put in a quarter and it tells you your weight. I weighed myself again today and I was 10 lbs less!! It's been almost a month so that's good progress! Or maybe that scale was busted; I don't trust electronic scales so much. Either way, I'm fitting back into my jeans again. About 3 weeks ago I couldn't fit into ANY of my winter pants from last year, so that's a relief. By New Year's Eve, I'll be back into my skinny jeans which is a RELIEF.

Also, I normally can't exercise with my iPod. I accidentally left it at home today and I STILL exercised...did sprints, even!! That's how I roll now. :-) Good Night!

Smooth sailing for Week 2.

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Notable items since Thanksgiving:

My friend Kelly started a new Facebook group called "Facebook's Biggest Loser". It's SO helpful because it keeps us all accountable to one another. Not to mention the fact that I'm ultra-competitive about stuff like this. We all have our gifts or specialties, and one of mine is the fact that I'm so used to being the among the "fit ones" in my social circles. It's something I had grown to take pride in until, like most other women I know, the babies arrived! LOL They have been MORE than worth it, and now it's time to get this body back into shape for good. Let's do it sisters!! :-)

Speaking of Thanksgiving, it was WONDERFUL! We visited with my mom and dad, and my sister and her family came as well. It's ALWAYS a blast when the 10 of us get together. Not to mention that my potato salad was the BIG HIT this year. This makes the 3rd year in a row that one of my dishes was the star of the show. My macaroni and cheese was just a tad too seasoned. I need to use less salt in the water in which I boil the noodles next time. But it was still a cheesy delight! The following we prepared the remaining dishes (potato souffle, dressing, turkey smoked greens and honey fried chicken) and let me just say that we spent Fri, Sat and Sun eating, eating, eating!! The food was DIVINE!!!!

I did get to do some things on my vacation list, and a few others went neglected. But I'm glad that I made an effort to "plan" some vacationy things to do. It kept me from focusing on un-important things that could be left to the regular routine work days (of which there are less than 3 weeks before my 2-WEEK Christmas vacation starts - HALLELUJAH!!)

LOL moment of the day (and possibly week) - My Gmail Chat status says "I'm around...so leave me a message". My friend Neal sent me this in Gmail chat while I was away from my browser earlier today: "i must point out that your status is truncated on my chat window...so all i see is 'im around..so leave' and somehow i can see you saying that in certain situations". He was logged off by the time I saw that, and that made me LOL, literally. :-)

And finally, the best news to report. For the first time in over a year, I have been able to stick to a healthy fitness/meal plan for more than 24 hours!! The best thing about this is that I haven't even had any cravings! That may not mean a lot to most of you, but those of you that know me VERY well know that I am borderline OBSESSED with food. Consuming yummy delights determines my mood in most cases. But this past Monday and Tuesday I only consumed the healthiest fat-free, low-carb, low-fat, protein packed meals. And I exercised both days; I'm SO proud of myself!! I'm on a roll!!